You Need an Emotional First Aid Plan
When your life feels like it’s upside-down, you may need to take a minute to find your footing. Whether it’s a new stressful situation or feeling triggered by a reminder of something in the past, it’s important to take the time to help yourself regulate.
Trauma survivors need to have an Emotional First Aid plan for when these moments hit. Even if you have a sense of how you might cope with being triggered, you won’t remember it when you are actually triggered. Being triggered actually amps up the part of your brain that feels fear and mutes the part that thinks clearly. It will be very difficult to come up with a good Emotional First Aid plan when you are already triggered. So take the time now, as you read this post, to start crafting a plan. Then put that plan in a safe place (like a note on your phone) where you will find it again.
What should go in your Emotional First Aid plan?
Identify your allies
a. Who in your life is a safe person you can call? List 2-3 people in case someone is unavailable.
b. If no one is available and you don’t feel safe to be alone, you can also call the National Suicide Hotline at 988.
Reduce your stress
a. What can you put aside today? Can you take a day off from work? Could you leave some household chores for another day? Can you order food instead of cooking?
b. Maybe there isn’t a lot you can put aside today. Try to find a place of self-compassion to do these things as well as you can do them, without needing them to be perfect. Can you let yourself be “good enough” today?
Care for your physical health
a. Your physical health has a big impact on your mental health. Not feeling your best will only make this moment worse. Make sure to get enough food and water, try to get some protein and real meals, avoid alcohol and drugs, take your medications, and get some sleep.
b. Alcohol and drugs may feel tempting right now, but they are ultimately going to make you feel worse. If alcohol or drugs tend to be a temptation for you in these moments, consider trying an AA or other drug meeting (https://alcoholicsanonymous.com/find-a-meeting/). AA meetings are free, anonymous, and occur multiple times per week both online and in-person.
Use your coping skills
a. What skills have you and your therapist worked on? Consider listing those in your plan or even having a folder of worksheets/ materials your therapist has given you.
b. Some ideas to get you started: physical activities (e.g., walk, run, work out, etc), creative activities (e.g., coloring, painting, singing, dancing, etc), social activities (e.g., spend time 1-on-1 with a close friend, invite someone over for movie night, hug a friend, etc), interesting activities (e.g., learning a new skill, watching funny videos, trying a new coffee shop, etc), or restful activities (e.g., lighting a candle and taking a bath, reading, listening to music, etc).
I want you to take some time, pull out a piece of paper, and start making your plan. The more you think through these steps now, the easier it will be to remember later. Think of it like doing a fire drill, just to make sure you know what to do.
If you aren’t in therapy, consider reaching out to a therapist for help. A therapist can help you make a plan that is tailored to you and help you heal from your trauma. Trauma recovery is difficult, but you don’t have to do it alone. Therapy can help. Don’t wait another day to start your healing journey.
